Rant | Off The Duff

Jul 16 2013

Kids Know

ARTICLE:

Kids React to Controversial Cheerios Commercial

VIDEO:

Reminds me of being in a brand messaging workshop at the Cannes Lions Festival of Creativity last month…

Out of the approximate 100 people in the workshop I attended, the majority of folks were South American, European or Asian. The agency sponsoring the workshop, Golin Harris, showed us this Cheerios commercial to ignite a discussion. I, and a handful of our UGA students, being American, were seemingly the only ones who had prior exposure to this commercial. We had already endured its fodder in our own time prior to the Fest.

What was so amazing to me though was that, when asked, literally NONE of the people in the room had any idea what the controversy was in this particular Cheerios ad. It finally took the workshop moderator spelling it out for the room (which, I can assure you he had not anticipated on having to do).

The fellow ad-industry professionals surrounding me audibly groaned, rolled their eyes or verbally expressed their disbelief at the moderator’s explanation of the trivial biracial factor of this ad.

How eye-opening, it is, that something that wouldn’t even be a blip on the radar in so many other parts of the world was considered controversial in the U.S. To say the least, it restored faith in my fellow man, but also made me question the me wonder what the hell is wrong with people here at home.

I know racism is very much alive in many pockets of the world in various cultures and countries every day. However, it is without question, a ridiculous issue for America –a civilized, educated (more so than other places…), Western society– to still have such a vocal presence at this day and age.

Grow up. Move on. Evolve.

Dumbfounding how a nation of people who have SO MUCH can still possess hoards of bigots who think so small…

Tagged Cheerios

May 17 2013

Tout va bien

Tout va bien. Tout va bien.

That means – EVERYTHING IS FINE.

Reports are beginning to surface on the web about a ‘pseudo-incident’ that happened along the Cannes Croisette (in front of The Martinez hotel) about two and a half hours ago here.

What was first reported as fireworks mistaken as gunshots then turned into actual gunshots then turned into a man shooting blanks holding an artificial grenade — and this was all before the international media even picked up on it.

Our students and program director – many of whom were still in Cannes at the time of the ‘incident’ around 8PM tonight – were not even aware that anything ‘out of the ordinary’ had occurred. I just sent an email to our listserv explaining what we know in an attempt to stay ahead of the potential onslaught of concerned calls and emails caused by more and more outlets picking up the story.

Now that a solid couple of hours have passed I am sickened to see the filth coming out in this desperate-for-clicks status update from the Facebook page of The Hollywood Reporter, in particular:

The Hollywood Reporter

Panic and chaos at Cannes Film Festival 2013. Christoph Waltz is rushed offstage on live TV amid sounds of gunfire. A man with a “suspicious device” is apprehended. Watch video of the terrifying incident. http://bit.ly/11KL5Ox

Filth. Fear-mongering. And a pathetic excuse for journalism. That’s what that is. ESPECIALLY considering earlier statuses and tweets from the mag’s social media pages regarding the disturbance were tepid at best. Now I see that they have “amped up” their wording and descriptions to compete with other sites who are picking it up. What an absolutely pathetic practice. I seriously may walk down to their booth by the Hotel Stephanie tomorrow and complain. We deserve better. The Festival – nay, THE WORLD – deserves better.

Furthermore, within 15-minutes of its posting, that ridiculous status had already been ‘shared’ by close to 100 others on Facebook (no doubt, by folks who are at least a flight away from the Croisette).

I am appalled and angered at THR who SHOULD know better as they are a mainstay here in Cannes each year and certainly have enough eye-witnesses on the ground who can assuredly report that everything is ‘business as usual’ along the Croisette tonight, despite this reported brief interruption.

It may be tomorrow before we find out the real story of what happened tonight, but in the meantime the last thing anyone needs is a false sense of fear drummed up by some desperate social media coordinators.

For attendees of the Festival and their network of friends and family alike spread across the globe, I beg the media to report the facts instead of cluttering up the phone lines and email waves should something truly newsworthy occur.

Signed,

Completely Safe in Cannes

(along with ALL of our 26 students and 2 professors…)

Tagged The Hollywood Reporter

Apr 22 2013

1 Comment

Rant, University of Georgia

Jeah Dawgs

Let me go on record as saying that E! television network’s newest reality show, “What Would Ryan Lochte Do?,” is the greatest thing to happen to University of Georgia fans, alumni and supporters since a star was named after our school. (It’s been a big week for us “Dawgs.”)

Seriously, this train wreck is a must-see for any red & black wearer. After watching the show you may even feel compelled to unroll that degree of yours and kiss it (only open-mouthed if it’s already been framed). That last part goes for not just Georgia grads, but for anyone outside of Gainesville, FL and UF, Lochte’s alma mater.

No lie, in my life I have actually had a University of Florida grad refer to UF as “the Harvard of the South” without a hint of facetiousness. I, myself, prefer the nicknames “University of America’s Wang” or “University of Where Tebow Once Cried,” but, admittedly, I am an unapologetic Gator Hater, and I digress…

My point is, the arrogance that is bred in that town is epidemic and the narcissistic dolt, Lochte, is but one example. Sorry I’m not sorry, Gator fans, but your university deemed this douchebag dummy worthy of the same “prestigious” degree you’re holding. Food for thought…

It’s not to say that the Lochtinator* is a terrible person or mean or what have you. He is just truly, authentically, helplessly unintelligent and, at least so far, is not in on the joke.

(*I’m not sure if I just made up that word or if it already exists in his lexicon of douchery with coined terms like “Lochterage,” “Lochtenation,” and of course “Jeah,” a catchphrase he ripped off from famed rapper, Young Jeezy.)

In interviews he sites Kim Kardashian as someone he admires since she brought herself from virtual obscurity to reality television super-stardom. However, one must realize that the person/brand that Kardashian and others before her (like Jessica Simpson) have created were done so with chess master-esque precision by their astute, albeit opportunistic, parent-managers which is more than can be said for Lochte’s mom (whose offspring, besides Ryan, include this idiotic racist).

Moreover, Lochte’s reality show predecessors understood the brand they were selling – they knew how they came off and laughed along with those laughing at them all the way to the bank. Being a calculated idiot (a sex tape with Ray J and “chicken of the sea,” anyone?) has proven to be much more lucrative than just a regular idiot (a la “The Jersey Shore” cast) which is why the now multi-million dollar industries of Kardashian and Simpson continue to thrive well past their fifteen-minute expiration.

Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe we are the pawns. Maybe Ryan Lochte is an incredible genius who has us all fooled. I have my doubts, but I guess only time will tell.

In the meantime, I’ll leave you with this and this and the clip below and I encourage you to at least sit through a few minutes of the swimming wunderkind’s show.

Oh, and GO DAWGS!!

Tagged Ryan Lochte, trash talk, UGA-1785

Feb 27 2013

1 Comment

Celebrities, Rant

Allow me to help…

Anne Hathaway.

You have earned success and an Oscar with your Broadway-caliber voice and a performance for the ages in Les Mis. You have also pissed a lot of people off in the process and are, for some reason, befuddled by this notion.

Allow me to help clear this up for you…

The heartfelt emotion you try to showcase in each of your exponentially more awkward, self-indulgent press interviews and acceptance speeches is transparently feigned. The demeanor you try to pass off as humble and appreciative is painfully disingenuous and seemingly contrived.

The common word and theme here is: TRY. You keep trying to say and do things that will evoke a positive and adoring reaction from people when in fact you are achieving the opposite.

People don’t like people who try so hard; it’s fake and ‘surface’ and reveals your true, poorly masked insecurities. These repeated, desperate attempts at authenticity and “down-to-earth-ness” must stop, Anne. Just stop. STOP IT NOW. It shouldn’t be that hard to just “be.”

In case you still have lingering questions or confusion, I have included the below photos to try and further emphasize my point. Note the differences…

…between this and this th (8) ,

…between this th (5) and this th (4) ,

…and between this and this 1759852 .

So, Anne, next year come awards season how about you channel a little more of this:

…and a hell of a lot less of this:

85th Annual Academy Awards - Red Carpet

Tagged Anne Hathaway, Oscars

May 15 2012

And then we got stuck in an elevator…

Yes, the rumors are true. Immediately following the joyous ‘Welcome Dinner’ nine of us got stuck in the teeny tiny elevator of our Residence. For an hour.

*It should be noted that while only eight people can be depicted in this photo there is in fact a ninth person – she was having a panic attack next to me in the corner on the floor – from the moment the doors closed. Such a dramatic scene!

The ridiculousness of this situation is heightened by the Frenchiness we encountered throughout: no one coming to our rescue even though we were four inches off the lobby floor and the front desk night watch man could no doubt hear us calling for help and repeatedly buzzing the black call button. It was only until I used my French cell phone to call the the Residence’s front desk that he acknowledged our situation – and even then – shat on it with a big pile of French poop.

Front desk man: (in French) “How many of you are in the elevator?”

Me: “Nine.”

Front desk man: (in French) “Well the limit is eight people. You shouldn’t get in with more than eight people.”

Me: (mentally) Of course it is… If I had said there were 8 of us he would have said the limit was 7. I love the French, but for real – F them sometimes, too.

What happens next is him telling me that they have called “the technician.” Good, I think, he’ll get here lickity split since this is a sensitive situation. Ohhhh no. The unhelpful Frenchie at the front desk proceeds to tell me this “technician” is coming from Nice as he was attending to another elevator disaster (what the hell kind of elevators are these that break all the time?!) and it will take at least 45min. Fantastic. Great. Katio (that rhymes with ‘patio’) has been crouched in the corner for 10min already crying and shaking. I tell him his time estimate is “too long” for us to wait, but alas, his unhelpful nature is unwavering. I get the sense he may even be smirking. Awesome.

Frustrated, I call Namita (the HBIC) and think for sure she will make something happen. In the very least she can call the local fire department (assuming there is a local fire dept — in four years I can’t say I’ve ever noticed one…) and they can come axe us out or something. She calls me back and says the fire department says to rely on the “technician.” Wait, what?! The FIRE DEPARTMENT said, “No”?!?! Is that even legal?! Firemen get cats out of trees for christsake – that surely seems less urgent than 9 people, 1 mid-panic-attack, being stuck in a small metal box hovering two stories over the underground parking deck. What the hell?

Realizing this situation is going nowhere fast, I begrudgingly begin to accept our fate and focus my energy on the others in this shoebox with me.

We laughed, we cried, we shared water (thank god Sophie had grabbed an extra bottle from the welcome dinner), and we shared Xanax (thank god Sophie had flown in that evening and still had her plane aid in her purse). It was a tumultuous hour, but we all made it out alive and bonded together.

It is no coincidence that NO ONE has ridden in that elevator since then and that most students are getting far more exercise than usual on this trip as most opt to take the stairs given our elevator incident.

Tagged elevator, Frenchies, Résidence

Off The Duff

unfiltered meanderings of my life and travels

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